Oakland Police Department Decides Not To Charge Goat
Yeah... you read that right. According to a Facebook post from the Oakland Police Dept, officers responded to call of a woman being chased down the street. By a goat. No, not like Tom Brady. It was not the greatest of all time, it was a heel jumping, b-a-a-a-d boy, up to no good.
When officers arrived on the scene, the "suspect" was not at all cooperative, and as the Oakland PD put it, "all their de-escalation techniques" failed. The goat was even frisky enough to take on the officers at the scene, also assaulting them with reckless abandon.
Eventually, the goat was apprehended, and returned to it's owners, who I imagine were simultaneously proud, and embarrassed. And the goat, likely went right back to being a goat, and thinking nothing of all that had transpired. Or was completely aware of the whole thing, and knows how cool he is. Truly, the G.O.A.T.