Guest Column about Christmas – by Wiley the Dog

Woof woof.

Thank you for the opportunity to speak for most, if not all pets across Maine.

As Christmas approaches, this holiday is like any other human holiday. We want you to enjoy yourselves, but we don’t want  to play dress up.

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Got it.

Don’t get me wrong. We love the attention. We love the fact you treat us like a human and get us gifts and include us. But please, don’t dress us up.

And I am not just saying this because I am a male dog. Trust me, I talk to plenty of bitches out there, and they don’t like it any more than we do.

Cats dislike it even more. Not that I talk to too many cats, but again, trust me on this.

If it’s Easter, it’s bunny ears

On Halloween the creativity runs the gamut.

I know you love it, when you post the pics of us as your Little Humans on social media.

And if truth be told, I think some of the pics are hilarious too. Priceless.  But if only we could talk, we would let you know, we really don’t like it.

We may not complain, but that is because we know who feeds us. Not going to mess with that deal.

Let me give you some research. First, when you’re not around and I gotta go, well, uh, see for yourself

So this morning I read a story about the Disneyfication of pets. And the harm it causes us.

Here’s the story 

But basically it says that

60% of pet owning households in Maine admit to giving their pet special treatment (such as giving them leftover food, and dressing them up) over Christmas.

Yup, sorry but that Christmas sweater you want me to wear may look good to you, but I don’t need it. I like to regulate my own temperature, and that Grinch sweater messes that up.

Thanks. But no thanks.

I gotta go.  Literally.

Let me leave you with this.

Merry Christmas to all, and my apology in advance if I bark when Santa lands the Sleigh on the roof. He gets me every year with that one.

Ho Ho Ho