So... Here we are in the middle of March, and honestly, my mind is really being pulled in two directions. 1) I can't stop thinking about a warm weather getaway, and spend some time in another zip code. And 2) I also can't help but think that we're almost at that time of year, where locals like us, like to hide out and be as inconspicuous as possible. What time is that, you ask?

Tourist season.

Yup. That's when our little city becomes the through-way for every weirdo from outta state who wants to see a little oceanic wonder. By itself, Bangor has a lot to offer, but we all know that most of these folks are just on their way to the coast, so they can take endless pictures, and throw away half of a perfectly good lobster because they don't know how to eat it. the right way.

So I came up with a list of six super-annoying questions that a tourist might ask you on a street corner, or in a store, or at the local watering hole, whatever. The thing is too, you can see it coming every time. Generally speaking, strangers never talk to me. I'm tall, bald, and covered in tattoos. But I guess if you just reeeeeally need to know where Red Lobster is, you'll get over yourself enough to ask.

Fun Fact: There is no Red Lobster around here, but when I was younger and more impetuous, I would give fake directions to one anyway. There days i just send them to the fish market like a good boy.

At any rate... Here are six questions that I believe could make your blood boil on the inside, when asked by a stranger. Fight the urge to yell, or give bad info because it'll just karmically bite you in the back side later. But just remember that all us locals are in this together, and that the tourist season will eventually come to an end.

Here goes!