You know it's happened to you. You're watching a movie that takes place in Maine, or it has a character from Maine in it. As soon as someone speaks, the movie is pretty much ruined for you because of how bad the Maine accent is represented by the cast. I' don't know if I've ever seen a movie where it was accurately portrayed.

I used to think maybe people from the south felt the same way, but A) there's a lot more people from the south than from Maine, and B) there's been a lot more study of the southern accent. So no.... I don't think anyone else in the country suffers as much as we do listening to people butcher our accent. Except maybe folks from Minnesota.

So when I saw this list from OnlyInYourState.com, I had to check it out, just to see how badly it represented us. First off... it's obviously written by someone from away, a phrase we actually do sometimes use. But it also sounds like they got punked by half the people they interviewed. You know there's some people chuckling somewhere like they just gave directions to a tourist.

To be fair, a couple were spot on. Like "ayuh'' or 'aren't you cunnin'?" Or called a milkshake a "frappe". Maaaybe once in a while we'll say "all stove up", but the rest of these phrases read like a tourist manual for out-of-staters, written by some dingbat from New York City that might have heard of Maine. It's mostly phrases we might use. But only as a joke.

Like how often in your life, have you called someone a "flatlander" and actually meant it? for me, like...zero. I've said it humorously, but never for real. Same with "way out in the willywhacks". But I have never said "send the kids down cellah". And I have definitely never said "what do you think you're doing ya dubbah?"..... complete with phonetic spelling. C'mon... gimme a break.

There's a couple on there that are totally old-school, I'll admit that. I've heard my mom say "darker than the inside of a pocket" and "happier than a clam at high tide". But even then, I've mostly only heard my mom say them when I asked her about oldy-timey Maine sayings. Never something she still says on the daily.

These doofuses at this website need to stay on their own side of the street. Otherwise, I'll be inclined to make a website dedicated to exposing cheesy websites that claim local things about people they've never met. Hahahahahaha. Of course, that would pretty much shut down the internet, and I'm just not that ambitious. Maybe in 2021....

Ayuh.

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